The most difficult thing is planning ahead because that takes a certain mentality. I am one of those let’s live in the moment types of people. Don’t fill my head with a lot of facts regarding some future event because my memory is slow fragile and limited. It seems that I deliberately avoid learning new information. I consider information things that I can really use. They’re not just random facts disconnected from anything. You should know this because someday you will have children. Stop right there, I didn’t have any and I am well past the age when one would be having them.

Here are some friends. That, too can be complicated because I often push people away. For one thing they want to learn about you. I met with two of Lizzy’s friends yesterday and apparently they wanted to meet me after they learned I had taken time off recently to comfort her. I decided I needed to be there. After meeting her friends we talked about going to see their cabin. However the story of the cabin sounded like something out of a Stephen King novel. I had suggested that we look at finding somewhere to go for the summer to spend a few days away from Milwaukee.

This could be the place or it may be my final resting spot. If you hear of a black man found in the north woods of Wisconsin, that will be me. These two women are fanatic readers and their pictures are of them holding books. All I know is, that the nearest major city to them is Green Bay and they drive around in some vehicle with well over 100,000 miles. I gave Lizzy information about where to find the car note in case she needs to find it. So fatalistic.

I keep seeing people run by my window and I am planning. Planning on friendship, furniture, bad cell phone reception out in the woods, being encountered by white men hunting for deer who mistake me for Barack Obama. Will we be able to find food or will we be foraging? There aren’t a lot of people in this place they call the UP, Upper Peninsula. I will pack a survival kit. I should have taken pictures of the women (without books) in case the police need evidence later on. I’m sure things will be fine. I will send a tracking signal to my family just in case, though. This may be why it’s hard to plan things.



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